横山やすしとの対談

『評伝 小室直樹』下巻p133から『週刊宝石』に掲載された小室直樹と横山やすしの対談が一部掲載されている。私はこれをリアルタイムで読んだはずだから、それは1984年7月。つまり私が駿台予備校京都校で浪人生だった頃読んだことになる。

『週刊プレイボーイ』だったかと思ったが記憶違いだった。

この対談は非常に面白くて、これを読むだけのためにも、『評伝 小室直樹』を読む必要があると思う。再び読めてたいへんうれしい。結局、世間一般の人からみた小室直樹という人は、この横山やすしが見たようなものなのだ。世間一般の人からみた、世間離れした学者というものの姿なのだ。ようするに、結婚して家庭を持ち、妻子をもっていないと人は学者のいうことを信用しないものなのだ。彼らにとってわかりやすいことを学者が言えば、彼らはなるほどその通りだとなっとくしてくれるが、自分たちの常識に反することを言っても理解してはもらえないんだっていう教訓になった。

小室直樹について

たまたまアマゾンを見ていて、『評伝 小室直樹』という本が2年前に出ていたことを知った。しかるにその上巻はすでに品薄状態で中古でもかなりのプレミアがついている。仕方なく、とりあえず上下巻とも図書館で借りて読むことにした。

著者の村上篤直氏は橋爪大三郎が編んだ『小室直樹の世界』という本に付録された目録を執筆したというから橋爪氏のお弟子さんか何かなのだろう。橋爪氏は当然小室直樹について熟知していた。そしてそれを村上氏にもたびたび語っていただろうし、村上氏も橋爪氏に小室直樹のことについてたびたび質問していただろう。その過程で村上氏は、橋爪氏がどうして小室直樹の本当の姿を書かないのか、小室直樹の評伝を執筆して世に広めないのか、橋爪先生が書かないのなら私が書きますよ、もちろん推薦文くらいは書いてくれますよね、くらいのことは言ったのではないか、と想像されるのである。

私が読みたいと思うのは小室直樹全集であり、その一つ一つの著作に対する解説であり、また校注である。しかしどうも橋爪氏はそのようなものを書く気はまったくないらしい。橋爪大三郎が副島隆彦と共著で書いた『小室直樹の学問と思想』ではただ、小室直樹は偉い学者だったとしか書かれてなく、その著作についてはほとんど触れられていないと言って良い。

で今回『評伝 小室直樹』を読んでその謎が氷解したような気がした。橋爪氏は書きたくなかったのだ。なぜなら小室直樹が出版した著書のほとんどすべては小室直樹が直接執筆したのではなく、出版社のプロデュースとリライトによって書かれたものであり、中にはほとんどゴーストライターが書いたとしか言いようが無いものも含まれているからだ。そのほとんどすべては小室直樹が自分で書きたいと思って書いたものではなく、周りがお膳立てして書かれたものだ。そんな著作群について橋爪氏が言及したくないのは当然であろう。村上氏は橋爪氏が書かないのであれば自分が、という半ば義務感で、この暴露本を書いたのだと私は推察する。

下巻256p、ある日、橋爪、白倉、志田が集まったとき、「小室直樹とは何者か」が話題になった。「最高のティーチャー」との結論で意見は一致した。

教育者として、学問の本質をわかりやすく教えられる能力は抜群のものがある。

では、学者、研究者としてはどうか、小室先生は何か発見はしたのか。ティーチャーとしては最低でも、大発見を一つでもすれば学者、研究者として名前は残る。たった一本でも、学術論文として意義のあるものを書けば、学説史に名を残せる。

では、小室先生はどうか。結論は出なかった。

ここはいろいろ考えさせられるところで、小室直樹がMITのサムエルソンのところへおしかけてPh.Dを取ろうとして失敗し、帰国して東大で学位を取ろうとして指導教官の京極純一になかなか学位審査をしてもらえなかったとか、いろいろ同情するところはあるが、結局、小室直樹が法学博士の学位をとるにはとったが、橋爪にあてがわれた非常勤講師や特任教授などのアカポスしか得られなかったというのは、厳然とした事実だ。客観的に彼が偉大な学者だという証拠は無い、ということになる。

上巻253p、「小室は、何かをするときに、雑駁だ。大づかみなことは正しいんだが、細かいところに目が届かんから、失敗する。」まさにそうなのだろう。

決定的な学術業績もなく、著書もまたマスコミに踊らされて書いたものだとしたら、では小室直樹に残るものとはなんなのだろうか。

それでも彼に残るものとはやはり、人を感化する力、なのかもしれない。

鬼滅の刃について

以前、少年ジャンプみたいな小説を書いてもらいたいと言われたことがあった。少年ジャンプみたいな熱血もので、映画やNHKの大河ドラマの原作になりそうなもの、ということだ。最初は書けると思った。書き始めてもみた。一通り書き終えてもみたが、それはまったく少年ジャンプみたいにはならなかった。いろいろアドバイスももらって直してみたが、どうしても少年ジャンプにはならない。

結局私には熱血小説というものは書けないということがわかった。

ワンピースのような、進撃の巨人のような、寄生獣のような作品は、私には書けないのだということがわかった。もし自分を殺して、ただ与えられた企画書の通りに書くことならできるかもしれないし、一度はそういうこともやってみたいが、しかし、自分が企画も考えて文章も書くとなるとほぼ不可能。また、企画をいろいろと出してみて後は誰かが書くというのであれば企画を出しもしようが、要するに、私にもちかけられた仕事はそれらのどれでもなかった。

もちろん、すごく面白い企画があって、自分もそれを小説にしたい、というシチュエーションがあれば幸せだと思う。しかしその企画が熱血ものとか、売れ筋とか、映画の原作みたいなもの、というようなふわっとしたもので、かつ、なんとなくすでにどこかでみたことあるようなネタふりだったりすると、やる気がでるわけない。そもそも私が好きでもなんでもない作品を例に挙げてそういうものを作ってくれと言われてやる気が起きるはずもない。そもそも私はNHKのドラマは朝ドラにしろ大河にしろまったく好きではない。

まあ世の中の企画会議というものはだいたいそんなものなのだろう。たぶん私はそういう世界では生きていけないのだ。もちろん私も自分の小説が映画やドラマになってもらいたいと思ってはいる。なればなったで面白いつもりで書いているのだが、まったくお呼びがかかる気配もない。

鬼滅の刃をざくっと見た感じでは、プロットとしてはアイ・アム・ア・ヒーローに似てると思った。アイ・アム・ア・ヒーローの連載開始は2009年らしいが、その頃はまだ私も惰性で漫画雑誌を買って読んでいた。アイ・アム・ア・ヒーローはやはりその中で私が惰性で読んでいた作品の一つで途中で読むのをやめてしまった。

鬼滅の刃の連載開始は2016年ということで、おそらくアイ・アム・ア・ヒーローの影響は受けていよう。舞台を現代ではなく大正時代に置き換えて、武器もショットガンではなく刀にして、美術にも凝っている。その辺りが受ける要素だろうか。

要するにゾンビものの一種だが、おおもとのプロットは1982年に出た遊星からの物体Xだろう。人から人へ感染してゾンビ化していくというもの。

鬼滅の刃に関して言えば、美術は優れているし、世界観や登場人物に感情移入できれば見続けることもできるかもしれないが、プロットとしてはそれほど目新しいしものではない。こういう作品は近頃たくさんあって鬼滅はその中から頭一つ抜け出した存在なのだろう。こういう連載物はなんでもそうだが最初の数話が当たるとそれをいつまでも引き延ばすだけのことだから、最初だけ見れば十分に思える。劇場版がみたいかといわれれば、まあそこで新しい展開があるなら確認はするかもしれないが、ともかくがっつり見ようという気にはなるまいと思う。

主人公の額に傷だか痣があるのはレディ・プレイヤー・ワンのヒロインを思わせるし、北斗の拳もまたそうだ。

結局、こういう前例があってこういう企画で売れるように書けばこうなった、という作品以上のものではないように思うし、何かそこから逸脱する要素があってそこで受けているとも思えない。こういう作品を自分で書くかといわれれば、他の人にも書けるじゃんと思うからたぶん書かない。大正時代に特有な、たとえば江戸川乱歩的な要素は感じるが、そういう世界観が特別珍しいわけでもない。

ほかの、源流となった作品を何度も見返すことはあるかもしれないが、一通り見たらそれ以上見ることはないと思う。ま、要するに幕の内弁当的な作品、ということになろうか。ツイッターでは旨味調味料などと書いてしまったが。

もっと言えば、私としては、誰かの解説をいくつか読んでからざっと確認するだけで十分な作品に思える。それは進撃の巨人もそうだ。別にその世界の中に入り込みたいわけではなく、単に、世の中で流行ってるから確認作業をするというだけのことだ。

ネタバレ無しでガチに見たい作品はほかにもっとある。

宅配業者

最近は宅配業者がいろいろ気になる。

かつては郵便局か黒猫か佐川くらいだったが、今は得たいの知れないやつが運んでくる。特にアマゾンから来る荷物が得たいがしれない。

こないだなどは某超優良宅配業者を名乗る謎の男がアマゾンの荷物を運んできた。出てみるとその会社の制服を着てないし、車もただの白いバンだ。レシートもアマゾンのものしかない。ますますあやしい。

某業者が、人手が足りなくて個人に外注したということだろうか？

それとも謎の個人業者が、某業者の名を出せばあやしまれないとでも思ったのか。

なんだか嫌な時代になったものだ。

郵便局だからといって不正をやらないわけではないことはいろんな不祥事でわかるんだが、しかし、目に見える組織がちゃんと責任を負っている。

わけのわからん個人に委託してほしくない。

犬の散歩

普通に考えて朝8時から10時の間に犬を散歩させるべきではない。

通勤通学の歩行者、自転車、自動車、みんな殺気立っていて、この時間帯、道を歩くのは非常に不快だ。常日頃できるだけ避けようと思っている。

特に危険だと私が思うのは、というより個人的に憎んでいるのは、電動アシストの自転車、会社のロゴも入ってない白いバン、そして黒づくめの宅配自転車ドライバー。

敢えて8時に犬の散歩に行く人はその時間帯しかできないからなのだろう。犬を引っ張るのに精一杯で、犬が私を威嚇していても、私に謝ろうというそぶりも無い。この犬にしても子供や夫などが勝手に飼い始めたものを妻が面倒見させられているだけなのかももしれない。などということを単に道で犬に吠えられただけでひとしきり考えたりする。

きちんとわきまえている人はだいたい朝6時くらいに散歩させる。そのほうが飼い主にも犬にもストレスが少ないに違いない。

他の人たちも別に8時から10時の間に通勤通学する必要は無いのだ。社会がそうだからそうするのだというのは言い訳に過ぎず、社会の大多数がそれでかまわないと考えているからそういう状況になっている。

コロナが流行る前から首都移転しようとか混雑を解消しようなどとかけ声だけはあったが一向に進まなかった。不可能なのではない。みんなそれほど関心が無いのだ。

私が働いているところでは今年四月になってもまだ屋外に喫煙所が残っている。そこは大勢の社員にとっては社屋の端っこに過ぎないかもしれないが、私の居る場所の真下にあって非常にたばこ臭い。廊下やエレベーターの中まで臭い。ところがこの喫煙所は保健所が来てここなら喫煙所にしてもかまわないという許可を得ているのだという。会社と保健所のお墨付きが出てしまった喫煙所を私の苦情でどかすことはほぼ不可能だ。

結局、どうでも良いことでも大勢の人が苦情を言えば世の中は動くし、どうでも良くないことでも私一人が文句を言っても何も動かないのだ。

10人の組織であろうと1000人の組織であろうと3000万人の組織であろうと1億2千万人の組織であろうと、私の不満など何も影響しないのだ。

Eumenes 1, Chapter 8: A Helmetful of Water

We are sinking in the deep desert. We have nothing to do but walking on the sand. Passing from a dune to another, I feel like everything is recurring forever, every scene is just like I saw before. It gradually makes my mind empty, lose my emotions and sensations.
“Go west, and we reach the end of this desert. All you have to do now is to keep going ahead.” King encourages soldiers.
I asks him, “Excuse me, my Lord. I keep in my mind several questions which I cannot resolve by myself. May I have your suggestions?”
“What? Tell me.”
“Why you love to keep wandering in the dangerous world? Why you won't stay in a city soberly but encamp in the fields? You never feel at ease. Why you can stand it?”
“Ha ha, simply because I am a king. I could rize the throne because my thinking and feeling differ from yours. It's quite natural.”
“I thik I understand, but could you tell me a little bit more easily for me?”
“What you feel difficult is rather easy for me, what you feel easy is conversely difficult for me. I cannot tolerate what you feel happy, but your pain is rather my pleasure. If you feel pain in pleasure, or pain pleases you, it means you get brotherhood with kings.”
It's a riddle to me.
“All right. Keep only in your mind what I confess you now. If I stay in my court, in the palace of Pulla, Babylon or Susa, my men are released from military services and go back home. Everyone sleeps well and have good time with his family. But, the court is NOT my home, but the most dangerous BATTLEFIELD for me, everybody there is my enemy.
We are now on the way to the world conquest. I'm happy just because everybody needs me. Every soldier is living in a very desperate life. That is the life he really needs me. I'm required only in battle fields. If I live in Makedonia, nobody will need me, but everybody will start to kill me. Also my father, Phillipos II. He didn't die in a battle. He was killed in his daughter's wedding ceremony. Of course he had many bodyguards. He was stabbed by one of his own bodyguards. Why?
Because he was a king. Then who made the bodyguard kill father? I don't know yet. Someone says my mother killed my father.
Hence I dislike fests, theaters, courts, and town crowds. Those are just horrible, very uneasy for me, never entertain me. Right?
I feel like everyone in a city would be an assassin. It would be the city I captured yesterday, or it would be my sweet old hometown.
No matter where I stay, I can never rest. A battlefield is the only place I can sleep well, because if I die, everybody will also die in battle fields, so they are desperately saving me. That only makes me safe and sound.
The more the situation is dangerous, the more our soldiers are obedient to me. I can grasp them at once if I gather them in a garrison. But, if I release them in their home town, I can't know what they are doing. Someone will attempt to kill me.”
“In a battlefield, you may be also killed by enemies, assassinated by your bodyguard, or handed over to enemies, like Persian kings or generals.”
“Yes I will die if I lose. It's natural. A king is safe as long as he is in battle fields and keep winning. Otherwise, he can die anytime. Give up your life. Tame your death. Only in such case, you can sleep and eat peacefully. Fortunately, I have more than enough talent to defeat enemies in battles.”

Hungry soldiers try to catch something like a beetle or a lizard to eat if they find it creeping on the sand.
One day we found a dried bush on a rocky desert. There were a lot of snails sticking to the stems. Soldiers even grilled and ate such worms.
Though the sand is totally dried, the rocks sometimes get wet with the night dew. Soldiers are striving to suck and lick such small water
Some of the light-armed soldiers are starting away from the army in quest of water, found some collected in a shallow cleft, or a small and mean spring.
Another day a soldier found a small pooled water in a cave, collecting it as much as possible into his helmet and carried it to King.
“Is this all?”
“Yes, my Lord.”
“I would drink if we have enough water for every soldier. I'm glad you give me but I can't receive this. It's impossible only I can drink. Since you found this, you may drink it.”
“Forgive me. I can't drink, either, while my Lord is thirsty.”
“Please. That's your water. You drink freely. Do not mind me.”
“Then, you give it to someone else, my Lord.”
“That's also impossible. If you don't drink it by yourself, throw it away.”
The soldier starts trembling. “I can't. I can't do it.”
Of course King suffers from thirst. This soldier also. And everybody. Who can give up the live water?
Thirst accelerates as time progresses. Dotted lights will appear on the back of your eyelids. A cat will cross in front of you or a rooster crows that cannot be in the desert. That's the sign the death is approaching. Finally we kill horses to drink the blood, and the next is the turns of humans.
“Wait,” shouts Amastri, on a camel with her sister Raokhshna.
“You don't, Amastri!”
Driving away Apama, Shaking Raokhshna off, she is coming, kicking up the burning sand.
“I'll drink it, if you waste.”
Panting, she reaches out her hand.
The whole army is watching her and King, anticipating what is happening.
Her lips are cracked, the white in her eyes gets dull yellow. The freshness of young woman's skin is also spoiled.
King squints into her eyes with a smiling mouth, says, “You want to drink this?”
“Yes.”
King takes the helmet from the soldier, pours its water upon the ground, in front of her eyes.
Amastri kneels down, scoops the still wet sand by her palms. But it is soon dried up by the sun and the wind, spilling through her fingers.
She gazes up King for a while, weeping faintly.
Soldiers were watching the incredible incident. Every soldier felt as if he had been the sand sucking the helmetful of water.
“Anytime we share equally, right?” King puts the helmet on the soldier's head. Only a drop of water was running down on his temple.

Ptolemaios breaks the silence.
“Everyone. According to the guides of the desert, the distance to Kerman is left only two hundred stadia. Keeping this pace and we will reach there before dawn. Evening is coming, but let's walk through the night. In the green fields of Kerman, there are shades of trees, fruit gardens, and running irrigation channels filled with fresh water. The major team already arrived there and are waiting us, preparing a delicious dinner. Don't get a stomachache by eating too much. Cheer up, this is really the last effort. Go, Makedonian warriors.”
From the bottom of sands, a rumbling cry occurs.
The soldiers, who has been as dry as fish bones before, recover the energy, stretch their limbs and spines, flashing their eyes, start locomotion like incarnated puppets. I'm astonished at the sight.
The whole army is banded together now, to accomplish our goal. Calamity forged us like steal. We must get through this desert.

Seeing my stunned face, King says shyly, “Eumenes, you think I barely saved my dignity by not drinking that water, nor letting Amastri drink, don't you?”
I must be shedding tears now. I wipe my face by my sleeves. And I regret I waste so much water from my body in this emergency.
“You invented it instantly.” I say.
“Invention? What's that?”
“Or you improvised. To gods, at several places in campaigns, you sacrificed various animals.
We humans have sacrificed goats, donkeys, pigs, cows, horses, or camels to gods. In myths, humans sometimes sacrificed humans, not only their enemies, but also their family. We've sacrificed most precious animals to most important gods.
Therefore you sacrifice water to the god of desert. Because water is most precious in deserts. In doing so, you were recovered the spiritual strength of the whole army.
Water is the holiest blood with no color. The holy of holies. Any animals or plants cannot live without it. You made it sucked in the sand. It means you made the god of the sand drink the blood of sacrifice. To pray for the safety of soldiers. Do I understand you correctly?”
“Ha, ha,” King bursts into laughter. “Amazing. Not I, but you are the genius to create a story. You give me a good reason afterwards for my unconscious, unintentional deed. I will explain so in the future when I pass a desert and pour water on the ground.
But Eumenes, you are mistaken. You completely misunderstand me. Or I made you mistaken successfully like I made other soldiers, whom I intentionally deceived.
I was just scared. I am always diligent to perform a roll of a good king.
You also heard the story of Vakhshuvarda. In Persia, a king never completes his life, nor wounded and killed in a battle, instead, he often loses his life poisoned by someone.
I don't drink unknown water. I don't eat given foods, either. I eat the same foods soldiers are eating. I reach and grab it by my hand and eat it. It's the most secure foods. I drink the water soldiers are drinking, sharing it with my own cup. It's the safest drink. Nobody can predict what food I eat and what water I drink. That is the safest dining for me. I've forgotten the taste of foods or smell of wines since I became a king. I don't and can't care those pleasing humans anymore. Eating and drinking is also my battle. I eat and drink to maintain my body, as well as not to be poisoned. As I said to you before, everyone's pleasure is my work, whereas my pleasure is everyone's burden.
Sleeping is also one of my tasks. Women is also. Love is also. For me, 'the most daring woman by whom I can be killed' is not just a metaphor. In general, a man can be relaxed and sleep well with his most daring woman. That's not for me. Every night I go to bed with my woman, I suspect she would kill me before I awaken. I would not probably be killed, but I probably would. She would love me, but possibly wouldn't.
Oh, Raokhshna, my beloved wife, but still I can't say I truly love her, nor I truly trust her. Yes, I must I truly love her, but I can't answer clearly, if I'm asked 'you never regret if she kills you?' I'm not sure. Raokhshna wants to die soon. Right. But I'm also thinking of my death any time. Always. I don't know how I shall be tomorrow, as a dying patient.
Soldiers mistake me of their own accord, that I am a familiar, intimate king, always share the hardship with his Hetairoi. But actually, my situation is quite apart from theirs.
And if, a soldier gives me not poisoned water with no evil attempt, I don't drink it, since it is not proved by some authority that the water is drinkable. I know it very dangerous to drink raw water pooled in a questionable cave. I'm a commander, can never get ill or die drinking such water.
I'm truly sorry for Amastri. I did terrible thing to her. But thirst is just a temporal suffering. It is no use if she dies to quench the thirst with poisoned water.
If I throw away water which a soldier offered me, with no reason, they will resent me. I feared the critical moment. Hence, I must have performed a merciful, self-controlled king, sharing all the hardship with his companions. That's a complete fiction. A roll play involving poor Amastri. A king must be an idol, always playing his roll.
Eumenes, take care of Amastri. I'm afraid I also give a deep spiritual scar to her as I did it to Raokhshna. However, because she is also a royal member, she must overcome such difficulties all her life. She has to learn to help by herself. She will encounter more and more calamities in the future.
Keep what now I said only in your mind. Don't tell Amastri. Also others.
I don't know the reason but suddenly something made me confess you, Eumenes.”
Oh, Basileus!

Eumenes 1, Chapter 7: Hidden Oasis

We at last reached the mouth of Persian Gulf sixty days after we had got into the desert. Good harbors welcome us along the sea lane to the inlet of Euphrates river. Nearkhos' fleet does not need King's support anymore.
Here King gave his army a rest. We can go straight to Susa traversing the Persian royal road, but King insists to join Krateros team in Kerman first, crossing over the Gedrosian range. At the entrance, there is the capital of the Gedrosians, named Pura, which simply means 'town' in Persian.
“How dare you came across this out-of-the-way district,” the old inhabitants said one and all, “but you cannot go any further. There is no road to Kerman from here. Nobody can cross this desert. There are various deserts in Persia. those of sands, those of salt, also lakes of salty water or dried up salt lakes. These are obstacles which never permit us to pass thought, but if we choose the relatively cool ridges, avoid scorching basins, tracing oases one by one carefully, we can trip through such districts somehow.
But in that way to Kerman, no vegetation at all. Except only one oasis. Reaching the spot is as difficult as finding a single drop of pearl in the ocean. You encounter dunes after dunes and just other dunes. Climbing up and down the infinite series of dunes in the heat of daytime, your colleagues as well as your horses and mules will soon be exhausted, finally you all are stranded and wrecked in the sea of sands.”
“Nobody succeeded so far?”
“Yes. No one had ever hitherto passed that way to emerge in safety from the desert, even though bringing a mighty army.”
“Without exception?”
“In legends, I know only two cases.” One of the old men spoke out. “Assyrian Queen Shammuramat and Persian King Kurush. When the queen fled from India, she emerged with only twenty men of her army. And the king, son of Kabujiya67, escaped with only seven of his men. Kurush also marched into this region for the purpose of invading India, but he did not effect his retreat before losing the greater part of his army, from the desert and the other difficulties of this route.
“In other words, if I succeed to pass the desert, I'll be the first one in history. It's time to excel King Kurush and Queen Shammuramat.” King rather pleased. “Old man, to get your story straight, the ultimate task to pass through this desert is to discover the only one oasis by all means. Am I correct?”
“As far as that is a possible task.”
“Can you help us? Does someone here pilot us? I reward him with big money.”
Few of them responded affirmatively.
Ptolemaios and I look each other, annoyed that our King once again hit upon an eccentric idea.
“I'm willing to go with you,” Raokhshna says with sinister smiles. “It's a quite nice opportunity for us to become mummies lying side by side, buried in the desert.”
“Have it your own way, everyone! If you spare your life, retreat to the harbor, get on board. Nearkhos will take you to Susa by water. Or if you have the guts to challenge the dunes, come with me. I think it is not so difficult to find the oasis, because we used to chase fleeing enemies surveying vast fields throughout. We can utilize the experiences to find the oasis hidden in dunes. Once it is found, maintaining the path is so easy task. We'll be appreciated if we make a convenient shortcut from Persian Gulf to Kerman. It also means I add a new royal road to the empire. It's an unprecedented achievement. Why don't you try it? You must be heavily rewarded and honored.”
“I'll go, my brother.” Amastri replied. “I must be as a brave woman as Assyrian Queen Shammuramat. A woman also can do what a man can do. Brother, my name 'Ama-Stri' means 'strong woman', which many Persian queens and princesses have been named. If you take me with you, you will be blessed by the Persian guardian god Ahura Mazda, the Lord of Wisdom.”
“Well said, my sister. You were given a good name. My name 'Alex-Andros' means 'enemy-breaking man' in Hellenic.”
King and Amastri were brewing an extraordinary positive mood, which prevented us from denying escorting them.

We made marches in the daytime and encamped at sunset. After it has been repeated three times, appeared the dunes, which are almost one stadion and a half in height. Since we met these lofty dunes of deep sand, not only humans, but horses and mules are still more, all suffering to proceed. We walk upon it just as though we were stepping into mud, or rather into untrodden snow.
Partly because we hasten ourselves to exit this place as quickly as possible, or partly because we cannot endure the burning heat under the sunshine, we changed the daily schedule; we take a short nap in noon under the tents shielding the sunlight, whereas go on marching all night long. When the sun goes down, we kick the asses of the still asleep colleagues to awaken. Even they start to walk, some are overcome by sleep, falling down on the sand, afterwards rousing up again. Those who still have strength follow upon the tracks of the army.
The blue sky with no cloud changes the color to burning orange in twilight. Dragged by the setting sun, a thin crescent moon also sinks into the ground, the heavenly obsidian cathedral is illuminated by myriads of stars.
We make journeys by the stars at night as sailors do by Kynosoura68, also known as 'Phoenician' constellation, or 'Mikra Arkos69.'
“What a gorgeous star night!” King exclaimed. “Look at the Pleiades, the constellation of Seven Sisters. It looks very close to earth, as though they were hanging in my reach. I could take the jewelry and feel it in my hands.
How beautiful the Galaxias70 is! We cannot see like this in the Hellenic sky.”
He enjoys this deadly desert, no birds flying over, no moisture growing trees in our sights.

We climb a dune, only to see just another dune ahead. How far we go, hills and dales of dunes come up again.

One night, on an occasion when King walked beside me, he abruptly talked to me, “You hear that a mass wedding is arranged in Susa, calling all peoples from all nations in the world.”
“Yes, I do, my Lord.”
“I anticipate it. Eumenes, you also marry at last, giving up the girlfriend who rejected you in Athens. What kind of girls do you prefer? A daughter of Darayavaush? Or one of pharaoh's? Otherwise Maha Rajah's girl?”
“I cannot answer such a question, because I have never imagined it before.”
“Mind you, I never permit you to marry a Hellenic woman. You must marry a foreign one.
Hey you, how about Amastri? If you marry her, I will be your brother in law.”
“The Princess? Please refrain from joking. She is just twelve or thirteen years old.”
“I'm already fifteen.” Somewhere in the dark dunes sunk under the starry sky, some woman said so. Amastri also listened it.
“She is royal, whereas I'm humble. We differ in social status.”
Amastri is too aristocratic to marry me. Apama will be more preferable, if King forces me to choose.
“I also marry Raokhshna to be my consort. Each one of Persian noble women, including Amastri, is married to some Makedonian or Hellenic general or officer. Oh, I almost forget Apama. She also. Since she is a daughter of the honorable general Spitameneh, her son will be a good brave general. Hence she will be married to the strongest general in my army. Who do you think is best, Eumenes?”
“I'm not sure, my Lord.”
Apama has no freedom to choose her own husband. And I and Amastri, either.

“My Father Vakhshuvarda, what do you think about it? I think Amastri will be a good partner of Eumenes.”
If I will marry her, Vakhshuvarda will be my father in law. The marriage of Amastri concerns not only me or King, but also the members of the Persian royal family. We must respect them.
In front of us, a herd of long eared animals were crossing. Someone shot an arrow at them to catch and eat, but escaped.
“They must be a family of sand foxes.”
“Sand foxes have long ears like hares.”
People buzzed for a moment directed their attention to it. Soon after that, silence returned. Vakhshuvarda started to talk quietly.
“Since Bakhtrish became one of Persian satrapies, a member of our family used to govern it. I have two elder brothers, Darayavaush and Artakhshasta71. My oldest brother Darayavaush succeeded the satrap of Bakhtrish, but at the age of fifty-five, he rose the throne of Persian empire unexpectedly, since the direct descendants of prior kings were all exterminated by a eunuch called Bagoi. He became the vazir to Hakhamanesh72 family, seized the superior power in the Royal Court, finally replaced King Artakhshasta III with his child by poisoning. As the puppet-king Artakhshasta IV grew a little older, he started planning to remove the evil eunuch. However, Bagoi again acted beforehand in order to protect himself and managed to poison and kill Artakhshasta IV. Bagoi then raised a cousin of Artakhshasta IV to the throne as Darayavaush III. When my brother Darayavaush III attempted to become independent of the powerful vizier, Bagoi tried to poison him too; but Darayavaush forced Bagoi to drink the poison himself. He finally succeeded to remove our deep-seated tumor.”
Got tired speaking while walking, Vakhshuvarda paused for breath. A little rested, he started again, pulling his right and left feet out of sand, putting into the sand again alternately.
“The battle of Issos, which we could never ever lose, put us into a predicament. But only a single defeat cannot perish our family. Persia should have enough power remained. But we were already a dying patient affected by a fatal cancer spreading to various parts of the body. We were at the last moment before extinction. Our family ate each other, the ruler and the ruled bit each other. We were far from expecting the national solidarity to confront foreign threats. The next battle of Gaugamela revealed the reality.
After vanquished at Issos and Gaugamela, my elder brother Darayavaush returned to his home country Bakhtrish crossing the river Oxos, planned to pull ourselves together in Samarkhand with general Spitameneh, but suffering consecutive defeats abandoned by fortune.
However, we still had possibilities to recover.
King, if something will happen with you, the Makedonians, outlanders without you, will never reign the vast domains of Asia. No one is capable of commanding your army like you. I heard that you even go to Scythia and Libya. Conquering and wandering one place after another. That is what every Persian king had desired but could never have done yet. I thought that your ambition would soon be aborted by your sudden death.
Hence we changed the strategy, keeping our homeland firmly just a little while, for one year or two, but no more than three years, I estimated. It was the road to a glorious escape. I convinced our eventual triumph.
But, my brother Artakhshasta betrayed our eldest brother Darayavaush, who was still on the throne of Persia, injured and abandoned him on the road, and raised himself to the throne.
My poor brother Darayavaush had died before he found by his chasers.
The self-proclaimed king Artakhshasta V had also never won. I and general Spitameneh entered Sogdia pursuing Artakhshasta and arrested the betrayer.
Spitameneh wanted to raise me to the throne in Samarkhand, call up survivors, preparing for the counterattack to the invaders. However, the strongholds in Sogdia were easily fallen one after another, my evacuated daughters Raokhshna and Amastri were arrested together, and at last Spitameneh was killed by his relations. The game was over. It was no use to ascend the throne by myself. I handed my brother Artakhshasta over to Ptolemaios and fell into your hand. You punished and executed him in Hagmatana, the homeland of Medes.”
“He usurped the Persian throne. A brother-murderer. His crime deserved thousands of death penalties.” King spat out.
“It's a pity that Spitameneh were killed by frantic relatives. He would have soon surrendered as I did.
King, I'm the last heir of Persian royal family. You appointed me to the satrap of Kaukasos. Also you protected my daughters, as well as my mother and my nieces, who were forsaken in Issos. And you married one of my daughter, and others to your comrades.”
I've never seen Vakhshuvarda such eloquent before.
“The fate of us, the Hakhamanesh family, the descendants of King Kurush the great, had at last run out after the elapse of more than two hundred years. I regard you as the host of our funeral ceremony, an angel sent by our god at this very moment. You restored the tomb of Kurush the great in Parsa. You also buried the body of my brother Darayavaush in Parsa, as our ancestors had been done. You reconstructed our graveyard magnificently.
I swore, in the name of our Lord Ahura Mazda, my loyalty to you, adoring on my knees, giving up my revenge. Now I rather thank you but never have a grudge against you.
But, you see, tens of thousands of descendants who share the blood of King Kurush the great are living in Persia. Do you never think that they would rebel against you all together? Don't you doubt it at all? Why you can be so generous?”
“Ah-em,” King thought a moment. “First of all, I love Persia, respecting. Makedonians hated Persians but admired its fragrant cultures and matured civilization. I'm not so perverse as Hellenes. They never unite, never cooperate, never try to get together. Never! Until they confront a critical situation. So loose people like dry sands in Gedrosia.
I love this boundless continent. I love this endless history initiated by Sumerians, flourished by Akkadians, Assyrians and Babylonians, and finished by Persians.
I clashed with Persia because it invaded us. I could stop conquest after liberating Hellenic city-states from Persia. But I didn't. I determined to invade Persia thoroughly. Why? Because I hate Persia? Or I want more glories? Not exactly. I felt deep sorrow for the decline of Persian authority, hence I wished to take Persia's position, the guardian of this world, by myself. I wanted to be one of the legitimate diadokhoi73 of Sargon74, Hammurabi75, Assurbanipal, and Nebuchadnezzar76.
Today I became a member of glorious Hakhamanesh family. I gained the legitimacy to rule Asia. Yes, this is what I was ambitious for. I want my comrades to understand and share my ambition.
And it is obviously natural that the strongest man seizes the throne of the king of kings. Who can a king without the grace of Heaven? A Hellene, Egyptian, Indian or Persian, regardless the nationality, the strongest man shall be my successor. I don't feel sorry if my sons, who are half-Makedonian and half-Persian, will be expelled by Persians or Makedonians.
Eumenes, you will marry a Persian woman and have sons, who also shall be kings.”
So abruptly mentioned that I'm quite embarrassed.
Somewhere a suppressed sigh leaked out of someone, was it Amastri? Vakhshuvarda recalls me and says, “Mr. Eumenes is a fine man, intelligent and gentle, assisting King's work wisely. I noticed that Amastri shows some affections toward him. I think they will be good partners.”
Vakhshuvarda finished saying and became silent.
Amastri loves me? Well, I've seen some symptoms in her attitude. It's embarrassing. She can't love me because she doesn't know me at all. What she can know about me? I am a man just always teaching her. She knows few other men, so she mistakes she loves me. That might be the only reason. Don't select a lover so easily.
It seems it's my turn to speak something, but I have nothing to say. Instead, I feel like asking my King some questions.
“My Lord, when you become an Asiatic king, Persian peoples will welcome you. Egyptians and Indians may also. But how about Hellenes? They are so stubborn to admit your reign. You wear a golden crown as Asiatic kings do, but Hellenes hate it. They prefer the laurel wreath, associated with Apollon77, which victors in Olympias have been worn, as well as ancient Hellenic kings.
You ignore them? Or you put the laurel on your head instead of gold to soothe them?”
“Stop thinking of it. Why you so adhere the difference in Hellenes and Makedonians? We are all KOSMOPOLITAN. It's better all peoples in this world share a unique nation and a unique language. In the beginning, POLIS was unique. LOGOS was also. But after some millennia, humans have been divided into pieces of DEMOS, unable to communicate each other. We must return to the very beginning of humankind. For that reason, Persians and Makedonians must take the initiative to be a unique Demos, to have a unique Polis, to share a unique Logos. And a new era of humans begins.”
King is sometimes so utopian and passionate. The world never catches up with him.

Next evening, we started marching again. King commanded, “Light signal fires. We are approaching the oasis. Infantry, spread to make a wide row at constant intervals. Cavalry, patrol and keep the infantry line. In desert, we hydrate or die. If we miss the only oasis in this desert, we will be dried up. Search around carefully.”
Someone reported that he found an oasis in the horizon. King investigated it but turned out that was a mere mirage. Other one says he saw a nomad riding a camel, which he stares at and waves his hand calling “Hey!” but nobody is out there. He still says
“There goes an Arabian riding his camel.”
“He noticed us waving his hand back.”
He doesn't tell a lie. Human mind perceives non-existent phenomena which cannot be seen when the thirst is so urgent.
The desert has been trifling our minds repeatedly. But suddenly, we found the oasis in a deep, narrow basin like a nest of an antlion. It's a miniature of a green garden. It is so deliberately hidden that we've almost missed it.
“Water!”
Soldiers are descending the slope, sliding down, rushing to the waterside, hardly undressing, jumping into the water one after another.
“Hooray! It's pure water! Not salty at all!”
What a crowd, pushing each other, animals also follow humans. Not a few soldiers were dead, pushed into water, unable to breathe.
“Oh, suicides with no meaning. You had better killed in a battle.”
King let us pull the dead bodies out from water to bury courteously in the sand.
“We have to encamp first apart from an oasis at least thirty stadia away. I must not make soldiers die like this anymore.”

“I want to take a bath, too.”
Raokhshna stopped Amastri, who is about to run after soldiers throwing her clothes away. King laughed at the sight, ordered me to draw curtains around a small fountain for princesses to bathe. Apama is also watching the site.
Recently, King seem to make me and Amastri couple together. Or it is possible that he already had such intention when he made me her tutor.
There comes the sound of water splash with playing voices.
“Hey, Eumenes. Come over here. Feel so good.”
It's Amastri's voice. She at last calls me without title.
“Stop joking, Basillissa81.”
“Basillissa? Don't call me by title. Call me Amastri, Eumenes. We are lovers. If you don't love me yet, after all my brother makes me your wife. Never mind anymore.”
“Stop, don't be so shameful!” Raokhshna scolded.
“Nothing is determined yet, Basillissa.”
“But if I become your wife, what will you do with me?”
“I don't have any idea. I discharge my duty and may go back to an Athenian school. In case King calls me again, I will continue to serve as a secretary. Or I will be a physician in my hometown Kardia.”
“Then I will be a wife of a physician, and my children will be physicians, too.”
She started again indulging in her own fantasy. I can't deal with her in every detail.
“I fear the story my brother telling yesterday. Regardless of lineage and ethnicity, a truly strong man will be the world king. May my sister's son and my son fight in the future to seize the throne?”
“Unnecessary anxiety. Nothing has even started yet.”
After that, the sisters became quiet. No voices, no splash sounds. I asked Apama to check inside, only found that they are already done bathing and left. I requested Apama to take away the curtains, after she also finish bathing. We have to go soon.